Regardless whether you saw it "coming" or BAM it just kicks you in the ass there were any number of factors that occured PRIOR to the "trouble" you are now facing. Some of those "factors" were quite literally YEARS in the making.
The idea of developing "de-escalation" skills is generally understood as a way to defuse or lower the level of aggressive intent and minimize the possibility of serious hands on physical violence. This is done thru verbal and physical actions that are designed to calm the stormy seas.
Sometimes it will work and sometimes it won't. I for one would RARELY place a bet on the general altruistic, logical, compassionate and thoughtful "nature" of humankind. So I would ALWAYS opt for the "mindset" that NO MATTER what I do, it most probably WON'T WORK. Somebody is GOING to get a severe asskicking or worse NO MATTER what is done to quell the "potential" violence. So it ONLY makes sense to hedge EVERY bet and do your UTMOST to insure YOU are the asskicker and NOT the asskickee.
Consider YOURSELF very fortunate that you even have the OPPORTUNITY to attempt a run at "de-escalation". That MEANS that you haven't just been KILLED or rendered hors d'combat OUTRIGHT. SO USE THIS "GIFT" TO YOUR FULL ADVANTAGE!
DE-ESCALTION, both verbal and physical should be a TACTICAL tool that at it's ESSENCE has NOTHING to do with your "percieved" intent BUT EVERYTHING to do with SETTING UP YOUR MOST ADVANTAGEOUS STRATEGY FOR ATTACK OR SURVIVAL!
I don't BELIEVE for a SECOND that Joey Dirtbag is GOING TO BUY INTO the idea of any "peaceable negotiation" ANYMORE THAN I WOULD! A grift is grift and a "front" is a "front". I KNOW the GAME and so does HE! AT BEST we're "dancing the dance".
MY JOB is be MORE believeable and SMARTER than the other guy. 'Cause we are BOTH RUNNING THE GAME. The best I can hope for is that my opposition wonders if I really am THAT STUPID to believe that my attempts at "backing it down" will really sway his intent to DO what he SET OUT TO DO!
So while I'm acting like my whole demeanor is screaming "HEY, BROTHER DEAREST, CAN'T WE ALL JUST GETTING ALONG". What I'm really doing is setting HIM UP for the inevitable crash landing.
He's thinking......LOOK at THIS sappy, pussy-assed schmuck. I'M gonna PLAY him right into the boneyard. I'M using ARTIFICE and guile to manuever HIM for MY BENEFIT.
Dance the dance of the biggest galatic wussy appeaser that was ever BORN. And while YOUR doing that bit of street level "pys-ops" manuever him into YOUR TRAP.
Curbs, poles, fire-hydrants, sharp edges and corners, brick facades, plate glass windows, on rushing traffic, whatever.........
Get his back to the nastiest most damaging shit in your environment. Place YOURSELF in the BEST attack line which is HIS worst DEFENSE line. Manuever yourself to the BEST position to ATTACK while SETTING UP YOUR BEST AVENUE OF ESCAPE.
THAT is what the DANCE of "de-escalation" SHOULD BE PRIMARILY ABOUT!
AND........if by some chance the gods of fortune smile upon you AND the mis-direction or your "de-escalation" PLOY actually WORKS................................................GREAT!
BUT ALWAYS...........ALWAYS PREPARE FOR THE WORST!
DE-ESCALATION is the ARTIFICE that SETS UP THE VEHEMENCE.
Besides I don't believe ANYTHING is ever going to work as "advertised".
Don't be a sucker.
Carl Cestari began his study of the martial arts with judo at the age of 7 under the direction of Yoshisada Yonezuka. During the past forty plus years Carl has dedicated his life to studying the martial arts, hand to hand combat systems, history and religion. What makes Carl unique is his combination of martial arts, law enforcement and military and real world experience. Carl has been exposed to a multitude of people with a wide variety experience. The following is a list of some of Carl's ranks and honors.
Shinan (Founder) Tekkenryu jujutsu
Ryokudan (6th degree) Koshinkai Karate under John Burrelle
Godan (5th degree) Jujutsu under Clarke of the World Jujutsu Fedaration (now defunct)
Sandan (3rd degree) Nippon Kempo under Narabu Sada
Nidan (2nd degree) Judo under Masafumi Suzuki
Shodan (1st degree) Judo under Yoshisada Yonezuka
Shodan (1st degree) Shukokai Karate under Kimura, Kadachi and Yonezuka
Shodan (1st degree) Daitoryu Aikijujutsu
Instructors Certificate- Charles Nelson System of Self Defense under Charlie Nelson